beatific_smile's Xanga

Monday, January 21, 2008

Mon, 21 Jan 2008 20:18:16 GMT

life is kicking so much ass right now.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Fri, 04 Jan 2008 04:58:25 GMT

I really hate myself sometimes. Like when I lose friends because I can't deal with things how they really are and not how I want them to be.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Fri, 28 Dec 2007 20:53:54 GMT

DAMNIT. I'm such an idiot.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Sun, 23 Dec 2007 05:17:58 GMT

I love feeling these feelings. And you'll never know.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Thu, 13 Dec 2007 01:56:06 GMT

I hate being single but it's getting better.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Wed, 05 Dec 2007 21:13:03 GMT

WTF. why is everyone getting engaged/married? seriously. What. THE. EFF? What the hell is wrong with me?

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Tue, 04 Dec 2007 23:18:02 GMT

new hair. it's alot of work, but apparently it's worth it.

If you watch Private Practice...

Fri, 30 Nov 2007 08:03:12 GMT

I am Violet.

Which means I messed everything up and it's going to take a long time to get over it. I've never felt like this before. It's been two months and I still can't breathe. What more can I do to myself? I can't even look at the opposite sex without wanting to hurt myself. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't drink. I smoke a pack a day and constantly have a knot the size of Kansas in my stomach. I find myself sympathizing more and more with the people who feel like there is nothing left, that love is an allusion, that marriage is useless, and that it is better to live without any attachment because none of us can handle another destroyed relationship.

The best part? Our mutual friends are already congratulating something fake. Makes me die inside. It really lets me know how much I meant to anyone.

What do you do? And I don't give a damn if you think I'm being dramatic. You've obviously never loved and lost. You can shut your mouth and go on with your empty life.

I'm too broken.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Thu, 29 Nov 2007 04:43:16 GMT

Awesome. Don't ever complain about anything I do ever again. You're a liar.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Mon, 26 Nov 2007 21:08:14 GMT

I'm now employed at LongHorn Steakhouse. I am also one step closer to getting out of here.